November 11, 2024

Healthy Eating Tips You Already Know, Damnit!

Or: “10 healthy eating tips that can go F*** themselves” Stop me if you’ve heard this one before. Actually, don’t bother – we both know you have. After an embarrassingly extensive deep-dive into the vast realm of nutritional wisdom (read: frantically Googling at 2 AM while eating chips), I’ve emerged with what can only be […]

November 11, 2024

Rowing the Seven Cs

Conquered the Stormy Oceans of Self-Doubt I stared at the rowing machine like it was some kind of medieval torture device, which, let’s be honest, it basically is. Three minutes into my thirty-minute commitment, and I was already questioning every life choice that led me to this moment. This wasn’t like my usual cardio escapades—no […]

October 29, 2024

A Step-by-step Guide to Counting Steps

The first time I noticed how many steps it took to get from my favorite window perch to the kitchen was on a stormy afternoon. Not that I was counting on purpose – it just happened, the way some thoughts do when you’re trying not to think about the thunder outside. Fifteen steps. Sometimes sixteen […]

August 27, 2024

Clear and Present Friendships: The DEFCON Guide to Favors Without Fallout

The restaurant hummed with the easygoing rhythm of lunchtime chatter. Silverware clinked against plates, drinks were poured, and conversations swirled lazily in the warm, low buzz of a typical afternoon. But as Billingsley sat across from me, asking if he could borrow my truck for the weekend, the air around us shifted. Everything slowed. The […]

April 9, 2024

Friendship Unplugged: Notes from an Open Mic Night

All the tables near the stage were taken, so I slipped toward the back, where I found a rogue stool that, much like my nightlife, had seen better days. Awkwardly, I clutched a bottle of craft beer with both hands, cradling it in my lap like liquid life-support. This artisanal brew cost more than the […]

March 14, 2024

Controversial Steps: A Psychological Analysis of Sock-Shoe Sequencing

Laced with Meaning: Unraveling the ssSS vs SsSs Debate In the annals of fitness psychology, few debates have raged as fiercely or divided communities as deeply as the controversy surrounding the proper sequence of donning socks and shoes. Is it sock-sock-shoe-shoe (ssSS), or the rebellious sock-shoe-sock-shoe (SsSs)? This seemingly trivial choice may, in fact, offer […]

December 9, 2023

#IWSTL How To Survive Christmas from The Movie Gremlins

It has become my own holiday tradition… but not one I am fond of. As the world around me starts gearing up for the holidays, I find myself saying, “This year, it will be easier. Enjoyable. This year will be merry.” But then, a delivery vanishes into thin air. A task, seemingly simple, spirals into […]