April 9, 2024

Friendship Unplugged: Notes from an Open Mic Night

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Opie Cooper Editor Apparent

All the tables near the stage were taken, so I slipped toward the back, where I found a rogue stool that, much like my nightlife, had seen better days. Awkwardly, I clutched a bottle of craft beer with both hands, cradling it in my lap like liquid life-support. This artisanal brew cost more than the average minimum wage, boasted notes of well-fermented intentions and subtle imposter syndrome, and sported branding copy more pretentious than my LinkedIn profile. It was, in short, the perfect companion for a night of forced socialization and amateur performances.

At 49, freshly separated and living in a new apartment that still smelled of Wayfair flash sales and regret, I found myself here on the insistence of Dave, the only friend I’d managed to make since my life went through its latest remix. “There’ll be tons of people,” he’d said. “You’ll have a blast,” he promised. “You’re sure to meet new friends,” he closed with the confidence of a person who discovers new friends as easily as some of us grow stray ear hairs. And to Dave’s credit, he was right about the tons of people, at least.

There’s something uniquely vulnerable about an open mic night. A Frankenstein of mismatched lighting equipment not only drew attention to the empty corner of the room designated as the evening’s stage, but also highlighted the particles of dust, dreams, and dormant desires dancing in the bar’s otherwise indifferent atmosphere. A solitary microphone took upon itself the unsung roll of stage-monitor, politely discouraging anyone from taking up the space for small talk, as meanwhile the uneasy ritual discovering the order in which the evening’s entertainment will take the stage has reached the ever unnerving point where someone had to accept they were going on first.

Tonight the reaping had selected a young, bubbly woman who introduced herself as “Just Jenny” and wielded a vintage guitar that surely would out class her in a boxing weigh-in. She wasted no time with banter or biographies and launched into a cover of “Wonderwall” that made me wonder if the wall was made of off-key notes and misplaced chord changes. As I winced through her performance, I couldn’t help but think of myself, the overly enthusiastic neighbor who met Kolby last week. I came on strong, all smiles and energy, with a personality that felt like it was trying too hard to impress. Like Jenny, my efforts left Kolby feeling slightly uncomfortable, and she eventually found creative ways to avoid bumping into me after our last encounter.

Next up was a middle-aged man in a Hawaiian shirt that screamed “I’m fun, I swear!” He started with a joke that fell flat, then transitioned into a folk song that somehow morphed into a five-minute rant about the price of avocados. It was painful to watch, yet I couldn’t look away. He reminded me of Gary from my new co-working space, who could turn any conversation into a monologue about cryptocurrency. Both seemed to have so much to say, yet so little awareness of their audience.

As the night wore on, performers came and went. There was the duo who couldn’t agree on a tempo, reminding me of the couple I’d met at a neighbor’s barbecue, finishing each other’s sentences but always slightly out of sync. Then came the beat poet who spoke in riddles, much like the enigmatic barista at my local coffee shop who always left me feeling both confused and oddly intrigued.

Just as I was considering calling it a night, a quiet man stepped up to the mic. Unlike the earlier performers, he carried no bravado, just a simple acoustic guitar and a presence that seemed almost apologetic. As he began to play, the bar’s chatter faded to a hush. His voice, initially tentative, grew stronger with each note, carrying a raw honesty that cut through my cynicism like a warm knife through butter. The song spoke of loss, of new beginnings, of the courage it takes to be vulnerable in a world that often mistakes it for weakness. As I listened, I felt a lump form in my throat, recognizing in his lyrics the very fears and hopes I’d been too proud to admit, even to myself.

In that moment, I found myself thinking of Lake, the apartment manager I’d dismissed as unremarkable during our first encounter. Lake, who I’d later discover was not just the manager but one of the building’s investors, a fact he never flaunted. Over time, through brief encounters in the lobby and chance conversations by the mailboxes, Lake had revealed a depth of character and kindness that caught me off guard. Like this unassuming performer, Lake had shown me that true connection often comes not from grand gestures or witty first impressions, but from the quiet authenticity of being genuinely oneself.

As the last notes faded and the applause died down, I realized something. Making friends, like appreciating music, isn’t always about instant connections or perfect first impressions. Sometimes, the acts we think we’ll love fall flat, while the ones we almost miss surprise us with their resonance.

I left “The Station” that night with a list of performers I wanted to see again, surprised by who had made the cut. More importantly, I left with a renewed openness to the potential friends around me, realizing that sometimes, the best connections come from the most unexpected places.

As I walked home, I couldn’t help but smile. Maybe Dave was right after all. It had been fun, in its own weird, off-key, slightly uncomfortable way. And isn’t that what friendship often is, with some acts we skip, and others we can’t stop talking about?

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